Bill Clinton's Mt. Rushmore of records, The Last Dance, and why Toni Kukoč still owes me $10.
Some thoughts about the first two episodes (installments?) of The Last Dance, and Bill Clinton's ever-changing rolodex of records. Plus, this week in consumption.
Spoiler Alert: Episodes 1 & 2 of The Last Dance
[…then again, being annoyed by the “spoiling” of a dramatized recounting of events that happened three decades ago is a bit like being three minutes into your first listen of Hamilton and getting pissed at Aaron Burr for revealing he’s the one who shot A. Ham, but I digress…]
Hey everybody, hope you’re well, blah blah blah.
Normally around this time of year, I’d be in full NBA Playoff mode, and picking this year’s Jimmy Butler-led team to advance about one round further than the consensus.
Instead, I’m spending an inordinate amount of time thinking about that one ‘90s-era Bill Clinton picture that’s suddenly getting a massive amount of social media airplay.
If your algorithms are anything like mine, you were exposed to variations of a cross-legged Clinton sat among a rotating cast of records ad nauseum over the past 72 hours:
And if you’re like me, you were a bit, “Hey wait a second, when did we all agree this was a thing?”. You might have fruitlessly Googled something like “Bill Clinton’s records”, and eventually found your way to a site called BillClintonSwag.com:
The rules to this… challenge? are a bit unclear. As for its origin, according to the website Know Your Meme, the image first appeared in a 1999 article in The Onion:
On November 3rd, 1999, The Onion published a satirical news article titled “Clinton Writes Fan Letter to Joan Jett,” which featured a photoshopped image of Clinton seated on a floor holding the Joan Jett and The Blackhearts album I Love Rock and Roll while listening to a record player through a set of headphones.
It seems like this meme originally started as, “records that would be funny for Bill Clinton to have in his heavy rotation”, but over the past few days has morphed into something along the lines of, “Here are my four favorite albums. Now I’ll tag X people whose music opinions I value to see what their favorite albums are. Also, Bill Clinton!”
The Advertising major in me wondered when the keywords, “Bill Clinton’s records” last received this much attention, and that took me all the way back to July of 2004:
After some extensive online research (by which I mean I pressed Command-F on Bill Clinton’s Wikipedia page and searched for “2004” ), I discovered that Clinton’s autobiography, My Life, was released on June 22, 2004. So that explains the July spike.
I also learned that the audiobook won the 2005 Grammy for Best Spoken Word Album, thought, “surely no other President has a Grammy”, then discovered not only does Obama have one, but Jimmy Carter is a NINE-time Grammy nominee and three-time winner, which is more than Tupac, Biggie, Justin Bieber, and Nicki Minaj combined!
So why is this meme suddenly so popular?
As Spotify’s annual ‘Your Top Songs’ playlists prove every December, people love to showcase their music taste on social media. Two tweets come to mind:
and:
Anyone who’s taken an Intro to Marketing class knows that Millennials / Gen Z love creative exercises in self-expression and anything involving a “build-your-own” element, hence the recent proliferation of “Chipotle-style” restaurants.
Plus, most of the people in those age brackets are impossibly bored right now, so this meme is also benefiting from being in the right place at the right time.
I interpreted this as, “What four albums do you think have exclusively great songs with no skippable tracks”. Off this criteria, I’d probably eventually settle on something like:
(and if you don’t recognize theses choices, here’s a playlist I made of them on Spotify)
But this challenge - at least how I interpret it - isn’t all that interesting when window-shopping through others’ picks. There’s a generally accepted 200-250 “best” albums that wouldn’t be shocking to display here, and the results I’ve seen are largely a mix-and-match from that list.
What I’m more interested in is - what would everyone have chosen for these four “perfect albums” as a middle schooler? Or even as an elementary schooler?
For example, David Zucker at age 11 would have probably gone with something like:
…isn’t that objectively more revelatory? To my mind, these are far more fascinating insights about the person in question, before they knew about things like Spotify’s Discover Weekly playlist, or Rolling Stone’s semi-canonical list of the 500 Greatest Albums, than another IG story that leaves you going, “Yeah, obviously Blonde is great”.
So my challenge to you, valiant reader, is to reply to this email with what you would have chosen for *your* Mt. Rushmore of Perfect Albums as an angsty teenager, a complete theater dork, or a total nerd who only listened to video game soundtracks.
Excited to see what you all submit, I’ll share some highlights next time.
Make your own at billclintonswag.com
Switching gears entirely…
(although Clinton does appear in episode #2)
If you still haven’t had the chance to watch the first two installments of The Last Dance yet, the legendary Jack McCallum succinctly summarized them for Sports Illustrated on Monday.
Much ado has been made about Scottie Pippen being just the 122nd highest paid player in the league during the Bulls’ dominance, Bob Costas’ 1980 hairdo, and Barack Obama’s credential in his cameo (and no, it wasn’t 2008 Grammy-award winner):
So I’ll do my best not to rehash the same talking points as the other dozens of Bulls bloggers.
As the second episode extensively details, Pippen signed a five-year, $18 million deal in the ‘90s, valuing long term security rather than “betting on himself” for more lucrative contracts over shorter lengths of time. I know inflation is a thing, CPI and so on, but here are 15 NBA players currently making more money THIS SEASON than Scottie did in those five years:
Total 2020 All Stars on that list: One, and he famously tested positive for coronavirus, which catalyzed the indefinite shutdown of all social interaction, so that’s kind of a wash.
(And shout out to recent H-O-R-S-E runner-up, Zach “Determined To Participate In Every Part Of All Star Weekend Other Than The Actual All Star Game” LaVine at #55)
Most of the first episode is setting the stage. The timeline frequently darts back and forth from the ‘97-’98 season to Jordan’s college days, rookie season, and eventually back to 1997. The late Jerry Krause gets a villain edit, and “Mike Jordan” becomes “Michael” after winning the NCAA tournament his freshman year (effectively his Sean Parker, drop the ‘The’ moment).
It’s hard to have any meaningful takeaways when only 20% of something has been released, but something I’m keeping tabs on is how unflattering of footage MJ will allow for as the ‘97-’98 season progresses. Given that longtime business partners like Curtis Polk and Estee Portnoy are credited as executive producers, it’s reasonable to assume Jordan had final say over which diatribes got left on the cutting room floor.
Present-day Bird doing a new line read of his own “God disguised as Michael Jordan” quote was an interesting directorial choice, and made about twice as amusing because of the adjacent, accompanying homer headline from the Boston newspaper: “Bird impressed by Jordan”.
Line of the Night: Bulls owner Jerry Reinsdorf, on Jerry Krause not inviting Phil Jackson to his daughter’s wedding:
“I’m not sure it bothered Phil that much,” Reinsdorf said. “If somebody doesn’t invite me to a wedding, I’d like to thank them.”
Literal Highlight of the Night:
Overall, these first two episodes made for a satisfactory exposition, and if nothing else, a comfortable two-hour content satiation for the sports-deprived masses. The old footage is pristine, Jordan has a few perfectly dismissive insults directed towards Krause, and we still haven’t even been formally introduced to Dennis Rodman, Ron Harper, nor Toni Kukoč!
Sources say Kukoč will use the docuseries as a platform to address an outstanding debt, in that he still owes me $10 from a halftime bet we made during a HPHS basketball game in 2010…
But more on that some other time.
This week in consumption:
Jordan-Related: ESPN’s Kirk Goldsberry on Why Michael Jordan's scoring prowess still can't be touched, complete with beautiful data visualization for Jordan’s shot selection.
Funny Read: a prime ClickHole listicle that watching The Last Dance reminded me about, “And Now, The Starting Lineup For Your Chicago Bulls!”
Filmed Concert: Beyonce’s HOMECOMING concert, available on Netflix
If you enjoy behind-the-scenes footage of a global icon as they hone their craft while performing for massive crowds amidst personal controversy at the absolute apex of their career, might I also suggest this inspiring, non-stop sprint of a concert/documentary.
Easily Bingeable: Sex Education (Netflix)
Even the antagonists are likeable, and I find every actor on the show incredibly charming. Also appreciated is the understated acceptance of all the interracial relationships.
Special I Enjoyed More Than Expected: John Mulaney & The Sack Lunch Bunch (Netflix)
Stand-Out Musical Numbers: Plain Plate of Noodles and I Saw A White Lady Standing On The Street Just Sobbing (And I Think About It Once A Week)
Until next time,